captain america ;

Bucky frowned even more, deeper and more harsh then the last. “I don’t want to. Now as I said, leave me alone or I’ll make you leave.”
With that he went to shut the door. Why did Steve have to carry this on? Why keep going with these..lies and hopes that didn’t even exist? God he just wanted Steve to leave him be, to let him get on with the rest of his life without the pain he had already gone through and the memories had already started coming back - that was something he dreaded.
“Just go….please….”

"I can’t do that, Bucky.”

Steve spoke through the door that nearly smashed into his face. Steve put his hand on the wooden frame and sighed. This wasn’t how he’d wanted it to go. Hell, part of him wish Bucky had found peace instead of being warped and tortured. Pressing his forehead to the door again, Steve tried like he had on the helicarrier.

“I told you, I’m not leaving you behind again.”

Hearing the knock on the door as soon as he had taken his jacket off Bucky bit his bottom lip, cursing in his head again and turning to see who it was.
Without thinking he just unlocked the door, opening it slightly to see who it was. However he froze - quiet, still. No words coming from his mouth nor did he move a muscle. He narrowed his eyes, glaring at the blonde before him, not exactly knowing what to do. After all his orders to kill him he just..he didn’t feel the need to do it any more.
“What do you want?” Bucky hissed, his voice low like a growl. “Leave. Me. Alone.”

He knew this was a bad idea, he shouldn’t have knocked on the door. Steve knew he shouldn’t have followed his impulses. Impulses made messes.

Getting snapped at, he should’ve seen it coming. Maybe he should’ve done what Bucky wanted, left him alone. Steve almost turned tail and ran, but instead he blundered in anyway, not thinking of the damage he might do. Steve opened his mouth, he needed to reply, to say something to Bucky, to say anything.

"To find you, to help you come home, Bucky.”

Giving a polite thank you Bucky just takes the key from the man and makes his way upstairs, wet boots from the rain making it uncomfortable for him to walk. The odd raindrop fell from his hair, dropping onto his shoulder, the floor, and he really didn’t care.
All Bucky wanted to do now was sleep, to keep his mind off of things and maybe get him out of this crazy world for just a few hours. It took Buck a few tried to unlock the door, his numb fingers fidgeting and fumbling with the key before it eventually slipped into the lock so he could turn it, Bucky cursed under his breath a few times in the process. Though the same man kept swimming around his head Capta- no Steve. Steve was his name and that was all he remembered for now. He clenched his fists at the mere thought of the blonde, the agonising pain that twisted inside of him was almost unbearable. Quickly he opened the door, stepping inside and shutting it before anyone else could see him enter the room.
Everything was so strange, after the helicarriers being destroyed and him saving Captain America all he found himself doing was just…wandering aimlessly. No purpose, not knowing what to do. It only made it worse for him knowing that one man knew everything about him and he didn’t know anything about himself.

In a way, he almost wanted the days of a simpler time back. Bucky the tall, smooth ladies man. Steve, the tiny, determined pipsqueak. At least he had his friend back then. Now, there was just a mess. Times had changed drastically, and Steve was barely catching up to them.

His friend had turned in, Steve speculated that Bucky had gone completely rogue. No Hydra, no superiors, the man was on his own. Perhaps Bucky was toughing it out better than Steve assumed. He always had when they were kids. Maybe he could see him and not lose it. Maybe it was safe to talk. Maybe this, maybe that. He’d only just found Bucky again after everything that had happened. There was no way Steve was going to lose him again. But the question was, was it worth the risk?

Apparently it was, because Steve’s hand had decided for him. Knocking at the door with everything on the line. This could be really bad. His mind was screaming about how stupid he was. About how he should run. But, he wasn’t running, his legs had locked up. There was no backing out of this.“

As Bucky makes he way out he gives the other tourists and guests a glance, however as soon as his eyes set on Steve he freezes for a moment, stopping at once.
“……….”
Bucky blinks a few times before shaking his head and making his way to the doors, finally slipping out unnoticed and forgotten.
There wasn’t anything he could really do now except find some place to stay the night, he wasn’t exactly the most wealthy of people now. Making his way to a nearby hotel he just paid for whatever he could afford, the damp room would be okay for the night till he eventually and finally moved on. The man at the desk didn’t seem suspicious which was good so perhaps he could have a peaceful night for a change and now that Pierce was gone he was finally f r e e.

If he’d been made, Bucky hadn’t given any indication. Steve supposed he wasn’t as good at hiding in plain sight as Bucky was. Letting out a breath he’d been keeping deep inside, Steve waited till Bucky was just barely in sight to tail him again. It was playing with fire, but Bucky was his brother. He’d follow him to hell. Maybe he already had.

Steve had to leave his bike in the museum parking lot, there was no way he could be covert on it. For now, he’d followed by cab. The hotel, maybe more of a motel, wasn’t exactly the Ritz, but Steve supposed they’d both stayed in worse in their time. All the Captain could think was that he wanted to burst in and shake the memories into his friend. Eyes locked on the man he was desperate to help recover, Steve mumbled to himself.

“C'mon Buck, what’re you doing here?”

#winterghxst

Bucky is trying to remember, to remember everything that has happened yet - nothing, a mere glimpse of perhaps memories but they aren’t so clear. Maybe he doesn’t want to remember what happened, maybe it would of been best to just not remember anything or the man on the bridge.
Yet his heart and mind are screaming at him, begging him to remember.
As he stands there, staring down at the words on the board he sighs softly, rubbing his hand over his tired face before turning to finally make leave.

Steve sees the quarter of a step, immediate panic sinks in. He lingered, it was stupid. Now he was about to get spotted and any good done to Bucky’s memories were going to be shot. Steve backed into a tour group, turning around himself. Tipping his hat down, he tries to look at ease.

Of course, standing at ease as if he were in a line up amongst the Howling Commandos wasn’t the most comfortable of stances, but maybe he’ll pass off for someone just trying to observe the exhibit.

Best case scenario, Bucky keeps moving and Steve can try to convince himself not to tail his friend. Worst case, everything’s ruined. Hell of a day, Rogers. Hell of a day.

winterghxst

He’s tense. Not expecting to see him here of all
places, but perhaps it’s a good thing. Perhaps
the memories are coming back to him now. The
Captain considers approaching, but decides not
to interfere. If anything, showing up now could
have some kind of adverse effect. Steve slinks
back, considering leaving, but not able to move
his legs in that direction. For now, he could just
observe.